In a Funk

I don't even know how to begin except to repeat the title and that pretty much sums up where I am..."in a funk".  At least that is my self diagnosis, maybe the Lord would call it something else, maybe it's a dry spell, or a "growing phase", maybe even a consequence to my disobedience.  None the less, I want to get out of this funk (why does that seem like a verse from an 80's song and then so wrong when describing my relationship with Jesus?).

Part of my problem is I went on my first mission trip to Haiti in October.  I need to detail that trip on another post, but for the sake of my funk I'll cut to the chase.  After returning from Haiti I had all this "stuff" I had to process, and I feel like my conclusion was...I HAD to change the way I was living to HELP others live a better life, all in the name of JESUS.  "All in the name of Jesus" being the most important part, because it isn't so much about trying to get a Target in Haiti, that's implying my life with Target is so much better than a life without it...and here is a shocker, that isn't the case!  Instead it is about serving HIM so that I may help others.  So from October until just a few months ago I felt "in the moment".  God would show me ways to serve and help and I felt the closeness to HIM that I long for and that makes EVERYTHING better.

Slowly, in these past few months, I have drifted from the closeness I once felt and my serving HIM to help others has been sparse.  Of course, I could ramble on a million excuses and justify why this has happened, but the bottom line is that I am in a funk.  I know what I need to do, could do and should be doing, but for whatever reason I'm holding back.  I'm letting "life" roll on day after day into the sameness it was the day before.

So, I'm praying and I'm hopeful that my summer Bible study of Gideon is exactly what I need.  I love my summer Bible study time, because it is when two of my high school friends choose a study to complete and then weekly have a conference call to discuss it.  Really, how cool is that!??!  After 20 years of changing, growing, and maturing we now get to study the Bible together...God is pretty amazing!  One of my favorite lines from Priscilla Shirer is this..."The bottom line is that empowerment by God's Spirit is a necessity for success."

Until we meet again,


Heather